Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Wedding's a coming! Last Update For a Bit

Poker:

Running incredibly well at NL50 over a few thousand hands. Bankroll up to $1,100 already from $780 3 weeks ago. Never had to redeposit.

It's good to see how much better I've gotten at emotional control in this past year.

The wedding's approaching in just 2 and a half weeks. Wow.

Everyone keeps commenting how calm I am. I find that odd. Because I'm not really calm at all. It looks like I've just got a natural poker face. But it isn't that I'm worried. No, no, no. I'm just incredibly excited.

I haven't ever felt a rush like this. It even trumps when I found myself conscious, but with a hole in my brain in a neurosurgery ward. I was on the edge of that great unknown called death.

My excitement here is so far beyond that, my mediocre writing can't do it justice. I think half the reason people think I'm calm is that I don't know HOW to express just how intensely crazy I am about getting hitched.

I've gotten over all of my second guesses about getting married already. I've spent the last 4 years thinking about marrying this girl and the past year letting the engagement really sink in.

I'm beyond any reasonable doubts. Rationally, I think anyone seriously considering marriage SHOULD be beyond doubts by this point.

In poker terms, I'm putting my whole liferoll on the line here. As a conservative player, I'm of course sure as hell that I'm making the right decision. Of course, we never really know what life has in store for us.

I'm all in, until the day I die.

Thorn